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Swiping through a seemingly unlimited pool of potential partners, the cycle becomes inevitable. However, if there’s always someone else, there’s never really anyone.
Swipe, match, have a conversation or two until FOMO kicks in. In psychologist Barry Schwartz’s book, , he explains that satisficers tend to be happier than maximizers.
This leads us to idealize one another, putting our “social media crushes” on pedestals without really knowing who they are. For one, your mere presence on the app comes with certain expectations and assumptions.
You’ll get super forward messages right off the bat (albeit, mostly from men) because it’s assumed that if you’re on Tinder, you’re there to have sex.
If you lose one person, it’s not a big deal because you have a hundred others at your disposal.
I guess there’s the flip side: if you don’t say anything, how do these people know that what they are doing is wrong?
And on the off chance they don’t actually say anything suggestive, they’ll probably expect sex if you hang out.
While most people are understanding when you don’t meet their expectations, this is not always the case.
Arguably, it always has, but even more so today, in the age of the online persona and Tinder.
Humans are complex and social media only complicates the issue.